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An old joke

Just remembered something I circulated when I worked at Interior, representing Fish & Wildlife Service, which had a captive breeding project for condors. It got all the way up to Secretary Hodel, whom I'm told almost fell out of his chair laughing. It was a handwritten note, with the pen held clenched in my fist to make it look "crackpot." It read:

PLEASE PLEASE PEASE HELP ME.

I AM BEING HELD IN A GOVERNMENT LABORATORY, AND FORCED TO PERFORM SEX ACTS WHILE GOVERNMENT SCIENTISTS MAKE NOTES AND TAKE PICTURES.

PLEASE DO NOT THINK THIS IS A CRANK LETTER

A CALIFORNA CONDOR

· humor